Mahalo nui loa

 Way back in the day my junior high buds and I smoked a lot of dope. It wasn’t so much we smoked it all the time, it was it took a lot of weed to get a good buzz. Back then I think much of the weed we smoked was just someone grinding up the entire plant, meaning very little of the flower mixed in with the rest of the plant.

This all changed the first time I tried Maui Wowie. This was the bomb. Half a joint of this gave us all this feeling we never had before and premium weed was the one and only way to go from that day on. No more ditchweed after that.

Maui Wowie then actually came from the islands. When Hawaii cracked down on cultivation the good Hawaiian weed went away and true Maui Wowie became rare. Every so often it would reappear, but it seemed anything originating from the Islands was labeled Maui Wowie and the consistency of the weed was about as consistent as the spelling of the strain.

Every so often good Maui Wowie would still make an appearance and it was always worth the wait.

The Maui Wowie from J Street Wellness in Sacramento is the stuff of legends. About 15 minutes after smoking half a joint I felt a serious buzz that lasted three hours. It was like a switch turned on, giving me a consistent high until the switch turned off three hours later. No highs and lows in this high, just a constant feeling of happiness and content. No feeling groggy or coach-lock, just straight good times with no ill effects afterwards.

 I only wished I had a copy of Young Frankenstein to watch. Next time I’m gonna be prepared.

Now if I could only find some Panama Red.

 Cost: $501/8 of an ounce

Vendor: J Street Wellness, Sacramento

Taste: Not a lot of taste, but a slight taste of citrus. I’d like to say pineapple or mango, but it was more lemony.

Scent: Much like the taste, a slight lemony smell, but the skunk smell takes over the entire room.

High type: This is the sativa fan’s sativa. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, but you will not hurl. Have a comedy ready, something like the Airplane movies should do the trick.

Appearance: Not really all that attractive, but it did have tons of trichome if you take a close enough of a look.